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Freedom


I normally avoid publishing really personal posts, but today is different. I'm sure there are many people who can relate and I am compelled to share.


his image is one of many of the beautiful works of street art in San Miguel de Allende, and one which I have passed more times that I can count.


Each creation of street art in this wonderful town has a story behind it and is worth admiring. However, being in the midst of a major life change and challenge, this particular work conjures thoughts of youth and idealism. How wonderful it must be to believe that "Freedom is Free".


It is not necessary to delve into all the freedoms we have and/or take for granted, nor point out the sacrifices man/nature has made since the beginning of time in the name of Freedom.


In September of 1999, I met a wonderful man who would eventually become my husband; a man who is smart, funny, sweet, charming, adventurous, motivated, handsome, athletic, kind and caring. Reflecting on him in the present is deliberate: it's how he presents himself in life and it's how I choose to remember him in our relationship.


Today, May 9th, 2022, our divorce is finalized. No matter how painful this experience was, is, and may continue to be, I will always believe that the marriage was successful and will cherish the time we had together. We had great adventures and made wonderful memories...nobody can take that away from me.


Since the separation 3 years ago, I struggled with "freedom".


A global pandemic halted the rental business I was solely managing and maintaining - my only source of income - and it went to zero. I had no financial freedom.


For a short moment in time, I questioned the freedom of my physical security.


My own emotions and limiting beliefs held me prisoner for months. This was probably the greatest threat to my "freedom".


Logically, we all know that there is dual accountability and culpability in any relationship. As this relationship came to an end, I experienced much self-blame and self-doubt, feeling that I was solely accountable, believing the negative narrative thrown at me, doubting that I would find love again or that I was even loveable; doubting my self-worth, questioning my ability to return to the independent person I once was, and doubting my professional capabilities and viability.


The stages of grief include:

  • Shock and denial

  • Pain

  • Depression, loneliness and reflection

  • Upward turn

  • Reconstruction

  • Acceptance and hope

Anger is also a stage of grief, one which never really presented itself to me.


Reasons don't matter. Mindset matters. How I choose to act and what I choose to believe about myself matters.


What is my freedom worth? It certainly is not free. Life is sometimes not fair and it's important to accept that which is out of our control. It sucks. It's frustrating. It can be infuriating. Life is not perfect. Situations present themselves in order for us to learn and grow. The only thing certain in life is, ironically, uncertainty.


I have a strong belief in my motto as a coach - and in life:

The Greatest Opportunities Are On The Other Side of Change


As difficult as change may be, it's a constant in life and something I have embraced time and time again. I have experienced much uncertainty in my life, yet here I am. Still alive, still so much stronger than I have been in the past, and knowing that I can handle whatever uncertainty comes along.


I know I am capable. I know I will be fine. Heck, I will be MORE than fine.


Many across the globe believe in me and give me emotional and moral support. I must be a pretty decent human to have such decent and amazing people in my life. I am #grateful


For those who experience anger, it's OK to be angry. It's NORMAL to be angry. Use anger to drive you forward because you are FREE. I am FREE. I choose to free myself from the fear-based emotional prison I have placed myself.


My future success will be based on the FREEDOM I have to make positive choices.


My future relationships will be FREE from negative thoughts of not being good enough.


Freedom is not free. Freedom has never been free. Many die in the name of freedom - this is NOT. EVEN. CLOSE to the price I am paying for my freedom.


This is a life-changing event and I KNOW that other great opportunities will present themselves because I am FREE to accept them!


Having love and peace in my heart is priceless.


May 9, 2022: My re-birthday. Happy Birthday to ME and my FREEDOM.


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